ins and outs for 2024.
A month-plus late to the trend, let’s do this. Because why not?
Queering the Burbs is a regularly-published distillation of pop culture, politics and queerness written by Joe Erbentraut. If you like what you see, please consider subscribing (it’s free!), liking or sharing this piece.
We’re almost a month and a half into this new year and I still can’t shake the feeling I had the last time I wrote in this space. The feeling of a false start. In an interview that the brilliant former Alabama Shakes vocalist Brittany Howard just did that’s linked in the final section of this newsletter, she described the start of 2024 as “suspicious, very suspicious.” Or as drag icon Jinkx Monsoon put it in a recent Instagram reel: “January was a long year, but we made it.”
Why is that the case? Maybe it’s because, at least in the Midwest, it feels like we’ve had maybe two weeks of traditional winter weather since the start of the year. Just last week, the temperature hit a record 56 degrees in Chicago. As I’ve sat down to watch excellent, cozy, wintry prestige television of the likes of the most recent seasons of Fargo and True Detective of late, I can’t help but feel a touch of jealousy as I take in the calm, quiet snowy background to these shows. How many years can we realistically expect the Midwest will still experience snow in the winter? Is that question so depressing that we don’t even really want to hear the answer to it?
And then there are the ongoing wars. Alarming indicators of the mental wellness of the two leading candidates for this November’s presidential election. Saturday Night Live continuing to platform extremely problematic public figures for reasons unknown. It all feels very suspicious, indeed.
Still, even as the horrors persist, there are moments of escape to be enjoyed. Last week, I was able to witness Howard’s music live at the gorgeous Thalia Hall in Chicago alongside my husband and some dear friends. The show was kicking off the singer’s national tour in support of her new record What Now? It was absolutely brilliant. She tore through songs both new and old, radiating both joy and a challenge to her captive audience. On the set-ending “Another Day,” Howard sang:
I believe in a world where we can go outside
And be who we want and see who we like
And love each other through this wild ride
And love each other through this wild ride
We were born in a time to change the paradigm
Peace is the prize of our timeline
Yes, I know we can do it ‘cause we must do it
I know can do it (So let’s get to it)
Witnessing her plea, I marveled at Howard’s ability to pen and perform words right now that continue to inspire. It’s something that I aim for in this space, but oh so often I just can’t find the words that feel right. Frankly, I’d rather tune it all out and eat some Hot Cheetos. But I want to keep using this space to express where I’m at and what I’m feeling with the hope that the words of greater substance might soon follow. Heck, maybe even a few more listens of Howard’s new record might do the trick.
In the meantime, I’ve been thinking about the science and art of the perfect “ins and outs” list. You may have noticed that your Instagram feed has been full of them in recent weeks (or maybe not-so-recent weeks, as I’m very late to this trend) and it makes perfect sense to me that this is a trend blowing up with the Gen Z set in particular.
An “ins and outs” list, of course, aims to express an authoritative point of view on what is trending and what is (like shell art) over in the culture. Often delivered as a Notes app screenshot, it is meant to communicate an air of casual authenticity, even though it was most likely painstakingly crafted with the hope of carrying an off-the-cuff vibe. Just like the photo dumps and vibe checks before.
But I am not above it. I can remember reading “ins and outs” lists in the first magazines I ever perused. Kid and teen-focused magazines were packed with them, always with the not-so-subtle aim of pushing one capitalist fad to the side while anointing the next big trend. As petty and superficial as those lists were, paging through those magazines at my local library at a very young age is where my dream of one day being a professional writer was born. Do I owe my career to Jonathan Taylor Thomas, whose face adorned the cover of those magazines at the time? Well, probably not, but what’s wrong with having a little bit of nostalgic fun?
So, as a treat for Little Joey and maybe a little recipe for how we’re all going to survive this year, here’s my own take on my “ins and outs” for 2024. I hope you enjoy and aren’t taking these days too seriously. It’s still just February and we’ve got a long way to go.
Ins:
Google calendar
Sweaters with a tiny hole
Garfield
Traitors (Alan Cumming and Phaedra Parks specifically)
Eating leftovers cold
Thinking about it
Medication
Being a little sleepy
“I love this song”
Trees (looking at)
Watching a movie
Down (the direction)
Wondering out loud
Mail-in rebates
Not posting to social media (aka moving in silence)
Outs:
Text message
Going “out”
Silly little guys
Faithfuls
Uber Eats
Setting up autopay
Little treats (ironically)
Afternoon cold brew
Architectural Digest tours
Hitting shuffle
Fog (brain, sky)
Looking out of window
Up (in general)
“No worries”
Good credit
Ins and outs lists
LINK DUMP
The Daily Beast: ‘The Traitors:’ Why Everyone’s So Obsessed With the Greatest Reality Show on TV
Today Show (lol): What Does ‘Babygirl’ Mean?
Rolling Stone: Cole Escola Is Revolutionizing Queer Comedy
Hollywood Reporter: Brittany Howard Enters Her ‘High Priestess’ Era With New Album ‘What Now’
"Being a little sleepy" - yessss, my time has come!
“No worries” as an out. Oh no, what’s the replacement?